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Tuesday, January 12, 2010 - ore 21:16
The three little pigs...
(categoria: " Vita Quotidiana ")
The animal I really dig,
Above all others is the pig.
Pigs are noble. Pigs are clever,
Pigs are courteous. However,
Now and then, to break this rule,
One meets a pig who is a fool.
What, for example, would you say,
If strolling through the woods one day,
Right there in front of you you saw
A pig whod built his house of STRAW?
The Wolf who saw it licked his lips,
And said, "That pig has had his chips."
"Little pig, little pig, let me come in!"
"No, no, by the hairs on my chinny-chin-chin!"
"Then Ill huff and Ill puff and Ill blow your house in!"
The little pig began to pray,
But Wolfie blew his house away.
He shouted, "Bacon, pork and ham!
Oh, what a lucky Wolf I am!"
And though he ate the pig quite fast,
He carefully kept the tail till last.
Wolf wandered on, a trifle bloated.
Surprise, surprise, for soon he noted
Another little house for pigs,
And this one had been built of TWIGS!
"Little pig, little pig, let me come in!"
"No, no, by the hairs on my chinny-chin-chin!"
"Then Ill huff and Ill puff and Ill blow your house in!"
The Wolf said, "Okay, here we go!"
He then began to blow and blow.
The little pig began to squeal.
He cried, "Oh Wolf, youve had one meal!
Why cant we talk and make a deal?
The Wolf replied, "Not on your nelly!"
And soon the pig was in his belly.
"Two juicy little pigs!" Wolf cried,
"But still Im not quite satisfied!
I know how full my tummys bulging,
But oh, how I adore indulging."
So creeping quietly as a mouse,
The Wolf approached another house,
A house which also had inside
A little piggy trying to hide.
"Youll not get me!" the Piggy cried.
"Ill blow you down!" the Wolf replied.
"Youll need," Pig said, "a lot of puff,
And I dont think youve got enough."
Wolf huffed and puffed and blew and blew.
The house stayed up as good as new.
"If I cant blow it down," Wolf said,
Ill have to blow it up instead.
Ill come back in the dead of night
And blow it up with dynamite!"
Pig cried, "You brute! I might have known!"
Then, picking up the telephone,
He dialed as quickly as he could
The number of red Riding Hood.
"Hello," she said. "Whos speaking? Who?
Oh, hello, Piggy, how dyou do?"
Pig cried, "I need your help, Miss Hood!
Oh help me, please! Dyou think you could?"
"Ill try of course," Miss Hood replied.
"Whats on your mind...?" "A Wolf!" Pig cried.
"I know youve dealt with wolves before,
And now Ive got one at my door!"
"My darling Pig," she said, "my sweet,
Thats something really up my street.
Ive just begun to wash my hair.
But when its dry, Ill be right there."
A short while later, through the wood,
Came striding brave Miss Riding Hood.
The Wolf stood there, his eyes ablaze,
And yellowish, like mayonnaise.
His teeth were sharp, his gums were raw,
And spit was dripping from his jaw.
Once more the maidens eyelid flickers.
She draws the pistol from her knickers.
Once more she hits the vital spot,
And kills him with a single shot.
Pig, peeping through the window, stood
And yelled, "Well done, Miss Riding Hood!"
Ah, Piglet, you must never trust
Young ladies from the upper crust.
For now, Miss Riding Hood, one notes,
Not only has two wolfskin coats,
But when she goes from place to place,
She has a PIGSKIN TRAVELING CASE.
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